No Missed Calls
It was already dark outside when I awoke from what was an unplanned long afternoon nap. Checking my phone again and disappointed at seeing no missed calls I rang the same number again which went straight through to the same crackly answer machine making me think that maybe those 2 birds in the bush had now flown away.
In Call Lviv Escorts?
With my cock now ready steady for some action, feeling as horny as ever home alone in a hotel room it was time to do something about it, just like my other travels around the world I wanted to hear again that lovely tap, tapping sound on the door of my room, the sound of a call girl telling me she has arrived and even better if she was with a friend.
So time to go online and first googling ‘lviv escort girls’ one particular expensive looking website with elaborate videos presentations put me off even before seeing the 200 Euros + prices per hour. Some old businessmen I should imagine are actually paying these silly prices without first even seeing some the girls faces.
Thankfully while scrolling down, the majority of working girls I found were on much more down to earth sites with the going rate in Lviv for both outcall and incall averaging around 1500 Ukraine (around 50 Euros per hour) to 2800 Ukraine for 2 hours. Despite not seeing any girls working in pairs offering their services viplviv – see link at the end was not as a amateurish and dodgy looking as some of the other sites I thought and as well as showing a good choice they had a large number of girls showing as available.
And this is where I became unstuck. Being the odd one out as being more of a phone person, old school if you like, i.e. one of those people who has always loathed sending long text messages and generally will only text people if I really have to as I just don’t have the patience fiddling about on those small piddly keyboards, I thought no more about the fact that my phone failed to send my message the other afternoon and having just successfully spoken to one of the girls on viplviv who was my first choice actually, when I tried to text her my details the same thing happened again.
As time was getting on now, thinking ahead of the specified visiting times for all non hotel guests and knowing just how casual to put it politely, some of these call girls can be with their general (not) timekeeping I could not risk now any visitor who agreeing to come to the hotel without me texting my details first turning up so late they would not be allowed up to the room, how humiliating and embarrassing that would have been.
Then I thought about going to them as an incall, after all Lviv isn’t a big city that’s why I assumed most of the girls charged the same price whether it was outcall or incall, but there again some text messages would still have to be exchanged. This was getting very complicated now, something I could do without especially on my last night, and to think I had all friggin day to sort this out.
Deciding to cut my losses and return to the same good massage place that I had a little taste of on my first day here, before maybe going on to one of those nice pubs in the old town for something to eat, just as I was leaving the room I received a call and for a moment thinking it was one of the young ladies I had just spoken to earlier, I was confused then realising it was one of the women who I had met outside the Fashion Club, still, good to hear from them at last I found it very hard to understand what she and her friend were saying, I did though just about understand that they too wanted me to text the name of my hotel and room number but what about the price? Time, and how long? Frustrated with the language barrier and there being no two-way communication I’m just sorry we had to end the call achieving nothing.
Weekday night in Lviv
While trying my best now to keep a positive frame of mind, experiencing now a typical weekday night in Lviv it took ages for someone to come and answer the door when I rang the bell at Empire Erotic Massage, they were very busy inside apparently and I was told to come back in an hour or better still in 2 hours time when more girls would be available.
So feeling quite hungry now and hitting the old town again in no time as I really knew my way around now, I wasted a lot of time crossing from one street to the other being told everywhere I went that the kitchen was about to close or was already closed. No problem getting a drink but it was food I needed then, and something a bit more substantial than something like a takeaway gyro from those places I passed.
I was just about to give up on my search when I saw what looked like a nice restaurant which was still open on Miskevycha Sq. Once inside in true ‘Can I help you’ Ukrainian style which you only experience, and probably don’t want to experience when entering these higher type of places at night I spoke to the hostess the face of the restaurant while her male security counterparts standing close by were no doubt face controlling me and checking me out. Guessing correctly that I wasn’t armed and meant what I said by asking if they were still serving food, I was ushered up a grand looking staircase to deposit my coat in the cloakroom before being ushered into the bar restaurant area where a waiter took over.
Nothing too over the top either, I thought the general decor inside was very nice but it wasn’t just the decor that caught my eye, as I walked in and sitting on a long sofa four young Miss Ukraine or Miss World or Miss I Want To Fuck You All Right Now girls looked up and one gave me a real nice smile.
Wow, I chose this place well I thought just right for my last night in Lviv and ordering myself a double JD and coke got down to looking at the menu which considering there was such a vast choice I thought was not that brilliant actually, it was the Asian fusion I’m not really into and I wasn’t really into the fact either that four or maybe even five times I had to ask the waiter who kept returning to take my order to give me more time as it was starting to occur to me the menu here was a potential mine field of different and very confusing how long is a piece of string price combinations making it impossible to know in advance the cost of most of the food items.
While a steak which I nearly ordered was priced per X number of grams multiplied by not what it did weigh but by what only those in the kitchen knew might weigh which involved a bit of guess work I suppose for those who knew their grams, weight averages and faith in the restaurant not ripping them off (and that was the easy one). Easier still some smaller dishes showed their true weight in grams which was the price you paid for the item just like in any normal restaurant while other food items on the menu showed up to three different prices for the same dish per the same X number of grams, very confusing, I didn’t even know what food items might have been a rip-off because I didn’t know the cost of it in the first place, to me it just seemed strange ordering something in a restaurant without knowing the price first.
Having to come clean with the waiter as he could have been standing there all night, I was very apologetic explaining to him that I genuinely could not work out the menu and the prices, something which in my adult life has never happened to me before and feeling very humbled with the whole experience I asked him for the bill and left him a good tip before collecting my coat from the cloakroom.
Once outside and thinking I was truly screwed now in getting something to eat good old McDonalds which was about to close saved the evening for me. No queues as well at that time of night I managed to grab the last McChicken sandwich, a burger and a coke and carrying my meal on a tray up the stairs to eat in, that is where I ended my last evening inside McDonalds on Svobody Avenue while they cleared the tables and mopped the floor. Ready for my bed as well as sleep now comes first, the old fuck I am, that’s it folks the end of my travelogue to lviv.
Coming up next time, mobile phone issues and I compare lviv to Kiev.
By Captain Matt