vilnius lithuania

Vilnius Lithuania

After my last mongering escapade in Klaipeda decided to keep a low profile.  Lithuania has some of the most beautiful women you will set your eyes on in eastern Europe but I wanted to move onto Poland.  But being in Lithuania I had to travel via Vilnius so may as well spend some time and try my luck mongering in Vilnius Lithuania.

Klaipeda to Vilnius

I was also interested in visiting Gdansk in Poland which is also on the Baltic coast but you could not travel direct from Klaipeda to Gdansk.  Problem is there is a Russian enclave in the way called Kaliningrad.  No ferries from Klaipeda to Gdansk the only way into Poland was via Vilnius then Vilnius to Warsaw.    I managed to book up a really nice cheap apartment in Vilnius at short notice via AirBnb but for just 4 nights rather then spending a week there.  My impression was mongering in Vilnius would not be much different to that of Klaipeda.

I purchased a coach ticket from Klaipeda to Vilnius the day before for 15 euros.  The journey time was 4 hours.  I am realising I really dont like these coach trips despite the cheap price, just to cramped.  I recommend you buy two seats next to each other to give you more room.  Not feeling that good waking up that last morning in Klaipeda like might be coming down with flu or something.  Hopefully I would shake it off in Vilnius.

Vilnius Arrival

At the bus station in Vilnius was really low on energy so just jumped into a taxi to take me to my apartment even though it was within walking distance.  The taxi driver made a meal of the journey and charged me 7 euros.  The apartment was lovely and  a supermarket nearby so stocked up.  I am still not feeling good and got the shits now.

Not Feeling Well

Unfortunately I had the shits bad and for the first two nights and days in Vilnius I have to just stay in apartment, this was not part of the plan.  Klaipeda had really kicked the shit out of me, literally.  So much for wandering off the beaten path.   Problem was I not have that long to recover in Vilnius as only had the apartment for 4 nights.

On day 3 still feeling shit but wander out onto the mean streets of Vilnius.  Read up about travel diarrhoea on the internet, about what I could eat and how to get some relief.  Reminded me that time I went down with severe campylobacter in Thailand on my last day .

vilnius lithuania
good morning vilnius

I found a chemist and purchased some Imodium and re-hydration salts.  I have to say once the Imodium kicks in it works wonders but is only temporary the shits return in full force once the Imodium wears off.  But I had to experience some of what Vilnius had to offer.

vilnius lithuania
Vilnius Lithuania

Felt well enough to do some tourist stuff around Vilnius and visited a few of the sights that day and evening and snap a few pics.  I needed to have a mongering experience in Vilnius though.

Old Town Strip Club and Expat Pub

I had done some research on Vilnius and put together one of my mongering maps of some key locations.

I had a loose plan of what I was going to try in Vilnius, first the old town strip club which had a reputation for not ripping off customers and then maybe checking out any freelancers in any night club watering holes like the expat and Irish pub called Brodvėjus or Pabos Latino club where a mature monger would not be out of place.

strip club vilnius
old town strip club

Outside the old town strip club, tout approaches me and gives me a flyer.  Standing by the door I can see a topless waitress at the bar and a few girls sat around, no customers though, the topless waitress comes over to the door with a big smile and wants me to come in.  I decide against it and head to the Irish pub instead.  Have a couple of beers in the Irish pub and a few girls sat around, groups of students etc, but just cant get in the mood, dont want to drink to much on top of my bad guts so call it a night.  At least I had got out and about in Vilnius but more what I should have achieved on my first night rather than my third.

Exotic Erotic Massage

On my last day and night in Vilnius the Imodium is working good and am feeling better.  I needed a release and one difference with Vilnius over Klaipeda is it still had some erotic massage parlors so maybe an erotic massage was the order of the day.  One comes recommended in the heart of Vilnius old town is exotic spa Massage Morocco.

exotic erotic massage
exotic massage

I check out the exotic spa massage in the heart of Vilnius old town and an erotic massage is 55 euros for 1 hour.  An erotic massage always includes a happy ending or handjob maybe with some touching if your lucky.

Happy Ending

I was led to the room by a pretty blonde Lithuanian girl maybe mid twenties and the room is really nice, candlelit clean with shower and good temperature.  Proper massage table in the middle of the room with a hole for your head.  Take shower and lay front down naked.  Within seconds her hand goes straight between my legs and on my balls.  I could tell by her hands it was not going to be a great massage but needed a release a happy ending to this Lithuanian and Vilnius mongering saga.  Her hands never stayed on the balls long, just brief touching kind of mechanical really, going through the motions of giving an erotic massage.  Turn over and for a minute I wondered if it was going to include a handjob.  Sure enough though she tosses me off and I have a happy ending.  She then stands behind me and gives me a lovely head massage for the remainder of the time.

Whizz Home

The problem with the Imodium is you think you are better but you are not.  I was wondering what to eat, maybe just a Subway but it was closed so had some Lithuanian food which included pastry.  Back at the apartment the shits were full on again.  That last night in Vilnius was going to try the old mans strip club but not well enough again.

I had had enough of this journey through eastern Europe.  I could not face a six hour coach journey from Vilnius to Warsaw especially not with the shits and no sign of them ending.  Getting concerned I may need to see doctor and go on antibiotics.  A flight from Vilnius to Warsaw was too expensive but I could get a cheap flight back home via Wizz Air to Luton airport north of London and then take the Thames link train back home.

That is exactly what I did.  The plan was I would spend a couple of weeks back home, recover, lick my wounds and then return to Warsaw direct from London and continue this journey.  Roll on the cool season in Asia.

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