Before continuing with my most recent adventures in Bangkok Thailand I though I would first like to do a couple of reports on my history with Bangkok. My first report is Bangkok Love story which chronicles the newbie falling in love with a bar girl.
My first trip to Thailand was in September 2002 and after a couple of nights mongering in Bangkok I head down soi 33 for the first time and into Christies hostess bar. I meet a lovely girl working in Christies and barfine and take her long time back to my hotel.
I break two of my three rules that night, I not wear a condom and fucked her 4 times. I fall in love but not realise it at the time. The one rule I did not break was I not exchange contact details. So thought I would not see her again. Back home over the next year I kept thinking about how good that night with her was. This picture is iconic for me.
Almost one year later I return to Bangkok for the third time. On my last night I wander back down to soi 33 into Christies and she is still working there. I barfine her again and spend another night with her.
Not as good as that first night, but she is still cute and this time we stay in contact. Back home we arrange for my return to Bangkok in a couple of months where she will leave the bar and spend two weeks with me.
You can take the girl out of the bar, but you cant take the bar out of the girl
During this period she sends me many pics and its obvious other guys have taken her to some nice places, nice hotels. I was not the first monger to fall in love with her. One guy even rang me one night on her mobile distressed asking who I was. She claimed no knowledge of it. I believed what I wanted to believe.
I return to Bangkok for the 4th time and she is waiting at the airport, ready to spend the next two weeks with me.
Spending the days with her showed a different side. She was constantly texting on her mobile phone, checking her bank, disappearing for a few hours here and there. She even joked about having 5 sponsors. There may have been some truth in that.
One evening she took me to visit her sister and her family who lived out in some estate on the outskirts of Bangkok. I felt she was exposing another side to her life to me.
During this trip took her to Koh Sumui for a few days to get out of Bangkok. Things nearly ended there as another boyfriend kept ringing her and I took the phone and told him to Fuck Off!
It was testing but could not give her up. I really was smitten with this bar girl. During this period not sneak off, not even have the idea of having a sneaky short time or sexy massage. One good thing , I was having regular sex with a girl I was in love with and affection.
Back home I become her sponsor and start sending her 10,000 baht a month. I believe she has left the bar now for good.
I return to Thailand for the fifth time May 2004 where we spend a couple of nights in Bangkok and visit a Thai Fiancée visa agency and start the ball rolling on bringing her to the UK.
We both have doubts and fears about this but cant just keep going back and forth couple of times a year to be with her. Take her to Patong Phuket for a week.
Here I am starting to stray again. Noticing some cute bar girls along Bangla Road and wishing I was on my own. Exploded on the last day as an Australian timeshare guy had given her his phone number and she not tell me until the end. Like she was keeping her options open.
Back in Bangkok we make up, on the plane she had been crying and cannot help feeling sorry for her. Some would say your ex Bangkok bar girl can turn on the tears like a turning a tap.
One night she takes me to meet her father and sister again, I splash out on a dinner for everyone, only a couple thousand baht, but felt her father liked me. Her sisters husband tell me it was the children’s birthday so I give them a few hundred baht. In hindsight this may have been manipulation of a farang’s generosity.
We spend the last week In Pattaya. It happens a couple more times in Pattaya – Tossers chatting up my girlfriend – a Thai waiter in the hotel and an Indian tailor – all the time while you are spending money. The locals have no respect for a farang with a Thai girl. They view it only as a temporary arrangement where the girl will become available again once the farang holiday ends.
This picture is also iconic for me. Its like the sun is setting on our relationship. In the back of my mind I want to pull the plug and get out of this love story.
Visas, Money and Paranoia
Back home the visa process is progressing and I send her 20,000 baht where the visa agency confirms she has paid it to them.
Im suspicious even paranoid about the whole situation – falling in love with a bargirl albeit ex bargirl from Bangkok. I am almost considering paying stickman to do a private investigation, I exchange a few emails with Stickman of Bangkok. Basically he will goto her bar – Christies down soi 33 and pretend to be an old friend of hers with me supplying the intimate details.
Tempting but if you feel this way, then the answer is already there. Private investigations of bar girls in Thailand is now big business. If you have not read Private Dancer then you should.
To gain you education of dealing with Bangkok bar girls before thinking you can play love games with them and not come to any harm. Another good read is Money number one more from the perspective of a Pattaya cheap charlie happy chappy though.
She makes some excuse about not being able to get some of the information required for the visa which I dont believe. Then one day with money pressures I decide to pull the plug. I cancel the visa application, I end my sponsorship of her and tell her I dont want to see her or hear from her again. By now I had run up some pretty big credit card debts funding this dual lifestyle but we lived in the age of balance transfers and rising house prices.
Couple of weeks later start texting her again. Cannot give her up or get over her. Still in love with my Bangkok bar girl. She tell me I break her heart – maybe. Problem is I not have any alternative distractions at home.
Back to Thailand for the 6th time in just over two years. I not even tell her I am in Bangkok this time and have a couple of nights mongeing in Nana Plaza and Patpong.
You can take the monger out of the bar, but you cant take the bar out of the monger
I then get a text message “Are you in Bangkok?” She got spies working in the bars. We meet up again and its lovely to see her. I take her to Pattaya for a few days.
She makes more of an effort this trip not to upset me, to stay off her mobile phone. We have a nice couple of days together. But I am mongering again now. She has to return to Bangkok after a couple of days and I stay in Pattaya but not alone for long.
I meet up with her again in Bangkok an with some friends and their Thai girlfriends. They quiz her and they tell me they think she is married to Thai man. But I am not sending her money anymore. Whats in it for her now? I do give her 10,000 baht before going home though.
My 7th trip to Thailand and the longest I had been away. Earlier this year had taken a holiday to Kenya. First holiday I had not returned to Thailand. After 6 trips to Thailand it was starting to lose its appeal.
This trip I had planned to spend with my Bangkok girlfriend, but at the last moment she cancels. She tells me brother die in motocycle accident and had to go home to family. True story is she has got scheduling problems. Another boyfriend is turning up probably the same time. I do manage to see her though for one afternoon.
Its the longest I have not seen her for, we embrace and its lovely to hold her again, to smell her. I then leave for my first trip to Phnom Penh in Cambodia. The plan was once I return from Cambodia she would spend a few days with me in Bangkok. It not happen, I get distracted in Cambodia and spend almost a week in Sihanoukaville and then mongering in Pattaya. She not replying to my phone calls or text messages.
Back in Bangkok I return to Christies on my last night almost expecting to find her working in the bar. She is not, some of her friends are still working in Christies and they tell me she long gone. That she keep secrets from them too. I was lonely would have been nice to wrap this trip up cuddled up with her in bed. By now I am wanting the best of both worlds when it suits me.
My 8th trip to Thailand in just over 3 years and my Bangkok love story is back on. We plan to spend two weeks together over Christmas in Bangkok and Pattaya. In Pattaya she gets bored though and returns to Bangkok. I am not really thinking about things we can do together, to keep her interested. Im kind of excited she wants to go. I monger in Pattaya and then break my foot.
On my last day in Pattaya she returns and we have a perfect day. How it should have always been. Seemed to work now but only in small doses. This picture is also iconic as it would be the last time I set eyes on her. In the morning we take taxi back to Bangkok where I am dropped off at the airport and cuddle and kiss her for the last time. Its like we both know it is the end.
Back home we still communicate. But I am starting to date a girl off a dating site and she detects something. May 2006 is the last time I talk to her on the phone.
I return to Thailand for the 9th time in August 2006 and then my first trip to the Philippines. In Bangkok I attempt to text her. But no reply. What I not realise at the time was that the Bangkok dialling codes had changed. So she would not have received any messages from me. She is still in my mind, I miss her.
At work December 2006 I get a phone call from her. But its some sort of mistake, no one talks to me. I run out and dial her number back but she not answer.
I return to Bangkok for the 10th time September 2007 and text her. She replies that she is married now. That was the last communication I have with her.
Before my recent trip to Thailand, I was clearing some old junk out of my loft and found some old phone records with her number on it. Withholding my number I call out of curiosity and the number is still active but no answer. I wonder where she is now?
That is my Bangkok love story. I will never fall in love with a bar girl again. A small flame inside still burns for her.